Nick Breaks Down
by Ashleighxx
Summary: Nick kind of has a break down. Does he leave for Chicago? Not Beta'd so apologies in advance :) If I have the wrong rating please let me know and I'll change it x


Set a couple of weeks after first date. 

_Schmidt, Jess, CeCe and Winston sit on the couch waiting for Nick who called a loft meeting. _

Schmidt: "Who the hell sets up a loft meeting and turns up late? Nick better have one hell of an explanation for this!" 

Winston: "Do any of you have any idea what he wants to speak to us about? He's been acting pretty darn weird for weeks. His funks usually last a couple of days. A week tops" 

Schmidt: "You don't think he's gone to the dark place again do you? I mean he is drinking a lot! And it's a lot worse than after, you know, Caroline crushed his heart with her perfect, perfect hands" 

CeCe: "What?" 

Winston: "That's all Nick kept saying for months after they split up. It was quite disturbing him wearing one of her tops, crying with a bottle of Jack. He cannot go back there again guys" 

Jess: "I thought you were in Latvia when they broke up?" 

Winston: "No one escapes Skype Jess" 

_Loft doors open and Nick enters the room cautiously. You can tell he hasn't been sleeping tidy for weeks and is starting to rock a two week old beard._

Nick: "Hi guys, as you know I called a loft meeting. I have something important I need to tell you all and its going to be difficult so no interruptions okay? Good. Well the thing is I've been speaking to my Ma a lot lately and she's not coping too well. And Jamie is being self centered and concentrating on his wedding with Trina and not helping Ma with the rent. So she asked if I could help. So I'm kinda going to Chicago" 

Jess: "For how long?" 

_Nick puts his hands in his pockets, looks down to the floor and starts shuffling his feet. Winston has known him since they were four and can read him like a book. So he already knows he's not coming back. _

Winston: "Your not coming back are you?" 

Nick: "No. But I got this months rent ready so there's no pressure of finding a roommate so fast" 

Schmidt: "This months rent isn't due for another 3 weeks! When are you leaving?" 

Nick: "Umm, well that's the other thing. I'm going tonight. My stuffs already packed and I just need to put it in my car and go" 

Winston: "What's this really about Nick? You know I talk to your Ma. She would have told me if she was struggling" 

Nick: "Look I'm in a pretty dark place right now and I just need to go okay. My Ma needs me, so I thought why not?" 

_Winston knows Nicks feelings for Jess and has called Nick out on his lies since she's moved in and knows this is about her. _

Winston: "You're room now!" 

_Nick and Winston walk into Nicks room. Nick is certain that Winston is picking up on the fact that he can't live with Jess. His emotions are slipping through the cracks and he's going to explode and have a major break down unless he can go as far away from her as possible to get over her. _

Winston: "I thought you controlled your emotions Nick?" 

Nick: "You don't think I've tried? I've tried for two years now Winston. Two goddamn years and I can't do this anymore"

Winston: "So that's it? You're running away from her?"

Nick: "It's for the best Winston, I'm gonna end up hurting her if I stay. I can't do that to her man"

Winston: "And you think your not going to hurt her when you walk out of that door? Just talk to her, stay and sort things out. You don't have to run Nick"

Nick: "There's no point, she don't feel the same way, so I'm gonna go. It's my move"

_Nick picks a couple of bags up ready to leave the loft. He walks out of the bedroom to find Jess sat against the loft door. Tears streaming down her face. _

_She really can't be this upset that I'm leaving can she? Ughh, I'm going to hurt her by staying and turns out I'm going to if I leave. Argh. What do I do? I can't stay here. The thought of not being able to touch her, even innocently has gone out the window. I can't be her friend and help her out with guy problems and seeing them touch her and have all of her is just too much! _

Nick: "Jess just move. Please" 

Jess: "No" 

Nick: "Please" 

Jess: "No!" 

Nick: "Jess!" 

Jess: "Talk to me please Nick. I can't let you go without talking about everything. Please. I need to know." 

Nick: "There's nothing to talk about Jess" 

Jess: "Yes there is" 

Nick: "Like what Jess?" 

Jess: "What did you write on those valet cards Nick?" 

Nick: "I'm not doing this now Jess. Move. Now" 

Jess: "Not until you tell me what you wrote." 

Nick: "What did you write Jess?" 

_Jess looks at Nick and opens her mouth like she's going to say something but doesn't, _

_so she closes her mouth again. _

Nick: "You really want to know how I feel Jessica? Yet you can't say anything either." 

Jess: "Please Nick" 

Nick: "You know that I can't open up and express my feeling yet you keep on pushing and pushing me and I'm getting sick and tired of it now Jessica!" 

Jess: "I know. Its just I need to know what you wrote. How you feel" 

Nick: "Why do you need to know what goes on inside my head all the time and know what I'm feeling? Its frustrating...  
You know what Jess? You annoy the hell out of me, You sing and dance about nothing, you walk around in your pyjama outfits, well guess what? they are just called pyjamas! Your so naive, you think everyone is good and you are so stubborn. For god sake we nearly had a threesome with Remy!...  
Your eyes are breath taking, they're blue. But when your happy they sparkle and when your sad, upset, hurt they lose that sparkle-like now and when you are angry and passionate about something they get all dark and stormy. You smell of vanilla constantly its weird and intoxicating. And your lips are just perfect and I can't stop thinking about how they feel against mine. Its like they are branded on me. And in between all the fights and rows and you baking and dancing to show tunes you have somehow became the most important insanely beautiful person in my life Jessica...  
And it scares the hell out me, it scares me because I need you. I need you too much and I have fallen in love with you. And it hurts knowing your never going to feel the same way about me...  
I'm just a 30 year old agoraphobic, turtle faced, borderline alcoholic bartender who doesn't communicate a feeling to save his life and is so lazy I can't be bothered to clean my room and do laundry. Maybe next time you talk about me with CeCe you should make sure you close your door tight and keep quiet...  
Now if you don't mind moving away from the door!" 

_Nicks eyes start to water and he needs to get out. There is no way he can cry in front of everyone, especially Jess_. 

Jess: "Nick" 

Nick: "Jess just move, please" 

Jess: "Nick" 

Nick: "Do I have to physically move you myself?" 

Jess "You love me?" 

_Her voice is shaken and crackly because she's been crying_. 

Nick: "I have fallen in love with you the moment you walked through that door Jess. Why do you think I turned down drinks with Caroline to go to the restaurant where you got stood up and sang dirty dancing, why do you think I done the slow chicken dance to cheer you up, why I hated Paul and all of the other guys you dated, why I went into the haunted house so you wouldn't be hurt by Sam, why every time you needed someone I was there, why I couldn't move in with Caroline, why I couldn't kiss you during a game...  
I don't deserve you Jess. You deserve someone who can provide for you, be able to buy your dream home, give you your dream wedding, afford to have kids and I can't do that Jess. It doesn't matter anyway cause you don't feel the same way. So just let me go. Please." 

_Jess moves and Nick opens the door, tears starting to fall down his cheek_. 

Jess: "I love you Nick" 

_Nick wasn't sure If he actually heard her. It was barely a whisper. _

Nick: "What?" 

Jess: "I love you. I love you okay? All those things I said about you, I didn't mean them in that way. I thought maybe if I keep repeating your faults it would somehow stop me from loving you. But it doesn't work. I just thought you would never feel this way about me. That you just wanted to sleep with me, get the sexual tension out of our systems. I never knew you felt that way about me and I'm not a gold digger Nick! You think I care about how much you earn?" 

Nick: "You seriously think id want to just sleep with you? Weren't you the one who said I can't have meaningless sex with beautiful women? Look at the guys you've dated since you been here Jess. Paul a teacher, Russell a successful business man and doctor Sam. I can just about to pay the rent on my own. and if I don't make enough tips then Schmidt helps pay for me. Do you think that's good enough Jess. That I cannot look after myself!" 

Jess: "But none of them are you Nick. None of them knew me the way you know me. I could never be able to be myself around them. I can only supress the Jess for so long Nick. They would never accept me as I am. You do. You make me feel comfortable to be around you in my pyjama outfits, bake cupcakes, sing and dance about nothing. You don't judge me. Yeah we fight a lot. But we balance each other out. You look out for me. Making sure there's no psychos in my class. You believe in me while I doubt myself. You make me the better version of myself when I'm around you Nick. I can't lose you. Please don't leave us. Leave me. If you love someone its simple. Loving you is. It comes out so naturally; like breathing. Without you I feel numb and I can't breathe. I need you. Stay?" 

Nick: "But I'm still an agoraphobic, turtle faced, borderline alcoholic who doesn't like to clean" 

Jess: "That's fine Nick. I fell in love with you as you are and you shouldn't have to change yourself. Not for me and not for anyone else Nick. If you want to start smiling, stop drinking and do something with your life then its down to you. Only change for yourself. If you don't want to then don't! I believe in you Nick. I believe In us" 

_Nick couldn't believe Jess' confession and is stood rooted to the floor in utter disbelief and confusion. What the hell am I supposed to do now? Nick thinks to himself. _

_Jess starts walking up to him slowly making sure he doesn't turn around and run. Her lips turn in the corner to a slight smile and gets up close enough to wipe a tear from the corner of his eye that he did not realize had slipped out. Her hand rests on his cheek and looks into his eyes trying to get an idea of what he is thinking. He's conflicted and confused, his mind is a jumbled mess of thoughts. _

Jess: "Don't think Nick, just feel"

_Nick closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. He opens his eyes and they're dark and clouded over. He leans down and gently kisses Jess. Still with some uncertainty until she kisses him back. All doubt vanishes as he deepens the kiss and Jess matches him, he pulls her close and lifts her up and her legs automatically swing around his waist, arms tight around his neck. He maneuvers them into his bedroom and locks the door behind them. _

Schmidt: "The no nail oath Nick. You're breaking the no nail oath! Jess I hope your prepared for the consequences of your actions. I don't want to, but an oath is an oath!"

CeCe: 'Shut up Schmidt"


End file.
